Civil War on an Unknown Planet

I just wrote a quick little sci-fi Ficlet over my lunch break and though I would share it here. The title of the Ficlet is Civil War on an Unknown Planet stems from some daydreaming I was having the other day. I was thinking about the future and if space travel would ever be as common as driving a car. Then I thought of what would happen if there was life on other planets? Then I though, what if there was life on other planets and we visited one of these planets, and what if this planet was in the middle of a civil war? What if we chose the wrong side to fight with? What if we fought with the “bad guys”? What if there weren’t any “bad guys”?

Anyhow, here is my story for your enjoyment. Remember I was limited to 1044 characters and I left the ending open for someone to continue on. Enjoy:


Civil War on an Unknown Planet

One was to take certain precautions when visiting a planet that had yet to be documented by the Federation of Space Travelers. Were the natives friendly to humans? Was there oxygen available or would one have to rely on a respirator? Most importantly, where was the nearest Pub?

Mitch knew none of these things as he began his descent towards the glowing landing strip, flashing the Spee-Lunker’s headlights in the universal sign of peace. He had visited thousands of undocumented planets and never once had a problem, save for the time he nearly made love to the President of Ecabosh Alpha’s beloved house pet. Species confusion aside, Mitch had no reason to believe this pit-stop would be any different.

A mile above the landing pad Mitch first noticed the ground surrounding the landing site was completely charred. “Must be some type of protective shield,” he thought as he ejected from his ship, too close to the ground to pull up. Ship gone, Mitch was about to find himself stranded in the middle of a civil war.

Thanks for the Feedback

Thanks for all the great advise about my first paragraph of my novel in progress.  I’m glad you all seemed to enjoy it.  There were some great comments too and I will consider all the suggestions.  I do think I’m going to put the first bit of the first sentence in its own sentence to add more emphasis.  These are the little things that I’m still learning about.  Also, I’m going to try to spread some of the information out so I don’t overwhelm the reader.  I don’t have to put all the hooks in the first paragraph, after all 🙂

Let’s see now, if I post one paragraph here a week for you all to critique, I should be done by the time I’m 60!  Anyhow, I’m excited to work on this and if I ever do finish the novel I plan on posting it online.