Yeah, I know it’s Valentine’s Day. Happy Valentine’s Day everybody. I’d like to be all Valentiney today, but there are more important things I need to discuss today. I’m here to discuss something so dangerous, so vile, that it threatens the very fabric of our society. Have you guessed what it is? Yep, I’m talking about those tiny shopping carts that have been popping up in grocery stores the past year or so.
They say we fear what we don’t understand, and I suppose that is true in this case too. I mean, look at that monstrosity up there, with it’s two baskets. It’s just not natural. And why so small? In this time of super-sized meals and monstrously large cars, why do people want teeny-tiny grocery carts.
Let’s think this through. If I go to the grocery store and only want a few items, so don’t grab one of these small shopping carts, I grab one of those handheld baskets, and load it up so full I feel as if my shoulder is about to pop out of socket. That’s the way it’s meant to be. If I want to buy a bunch of stuff, I go for the big grocery cart, just as God intended me to.
What do you think about these tiny carts? Have you used one? In my mind there are only two camps here: pro-little-cart and con-little-cart. As you can tell, I’m firmly in the latter camp. You are either with us or you are against us, to quote a very wise man.
Note: I thought up this whole post while shopping for diapers and such yesterday, and yes, I did use the big cart. I hope you found it funny. It was meant to be.