The Towel Remains Unthrown – For Now

#nanowrimo moment of truth for me tonight. If I can’t get close to my goal for today, I’m throwing in the towel.

That was a tweet I posted last night through rapidly blinking eyes, just after we got everybody in bed and I settled down at the computer to begin my NaNoWriMo writing for the day, 0 out of 2,000 words written. This wasn’t one of those woe is me posts. I really meant it.

I’m just feeling really exhausted lately. It’s throwing me off a bit. Yes, I quit drinking pop. However, I’m still drinking coffee, so I don’t think it’s a lack of caffeine. Maybe it’s just the 15 days in a row of staying up until midnight. Or maybe it’s the baby waking us at 5:30 AM every morning and the hockey game at 6:30 AM. Whatever it is, I’m running on fumes. Again, that’s just weird because I have conditioned my body to function on very little sleep now that we have kids.

Take the events before I wrote that tweet. Gave the son a bath, played a little wii fit, fought with the daughter over what clothes she would sleep in (she HAS to choose), and then finally I read to my daughter in her bed to get her to sleep. The night’s literary masterpiece was Garfield the Easter Bunny.

I love reading to my daughter, but last night was a struggle. In fact, I fell asleep while reading and wound up dreaming and speaking words that weren’t in the text. I can only imagine what she thought of this, though she must not have noticed because she would have corrected me. Anyhow, once I finished reading, she rolled over and closed her eyes, meaning she was ready to sleep. And I closed my eyes just for a moment, to rest them of course. Eventually, I drug myself out of her bed and trudged to the computer, that word count taunting me.

The only thing keeping me writing right now is my competitive spirit and all of you. I mean I spent the whole of last month talking about NaNoWriMo and getting you all worked up for writing in November. I couldn’t very well give up, not halfway through the month.

I wound up writing 1,700 words somehow. Maybe it was the popsicle power boost. I’d didn’t make it to my daily goal of 2,000, but I got close enough to keep going for another day.

And so it is. I write on. One day at a time. Anticipating the day when I face reality and just give up, but also pushing that fateful day back each time I meet my goal.

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13 thoughts on “The Towel Remains Unthrown – For Now

  1. much applause and respect for not giving up!!

    Even if you don’t “win” NaNo, you still win. Every word you write is a word you didn’t have before, and brings you closer to a finished book.

    Still, I think you can do it!! I’m so impressed with your sacrificing sleep to get those words in.

  2. I am so glad you are not giving up!!!!

    I had no idea how hard this would be when I started. I don’t have kids so I don’t really have any other responsibilies after I get home from work, so I haven’t had many late nights. But…

    My laundry isn’t done and my husband and I have not worn underwear in 4 days.

    I have no clean glasses in my kitchen. My husband actually went out and bought plastic cups to use because he is sick of cleaning up after me.

    I don’t remember the last time I paid bills and am fairly certain that there are plenty that are overdue.

    HANG IN THERE!!!! And start planning your victory dance because you are half way there. In my eyes, we are both past the point of no return!

  3. I’m so far behind that I can’t even see 50,000. You, on the other hand, are tearing it up.

    You’re half way home, and you have reason to be proud. Drag it to the finish line if you must, but don’t quit.

  4. You will do it, but you already know that.

    Falling asleep while reading to your child made for quite the mental image. Made me smile…

    The popsicle (or ice cream or cupcake or chocolate caramel fudge cake) boost is a very, very important part of keeping ones’ brain functioning at maximum power, plus the sticky fingers on your keyboard capture the dust and, eventually, you have your own velvet keyboard…okay, that’s just silly, isn’t it?

  5. It seems I’ll be taking the devil’s advocate position yet again. If you make it, and way to go on your dedication btw– woot you! But if you don’t, it is just an imaginary deadline. Just keep going into Dec, Jan , Feb etc.

    Last Feb I pulled a bunch of staying up until 2-3 a.m. writing “all nighters” because some agent had inquired how my revision was coming along and I felt pressured to get it to her. This wasn’t *my* agent, just one i’d queried. I killed myself getting my whole novel revised in three weeks, only to have her sit on it for 6 months and never ultimately reply actually. (Headdesk)

    Publishing moves s l o w. It’s really not a race.

  6. “In fact, I fell asleep while reading and wound up dreaming and speaking words that weren’t in the text.” – this happens to me quite often when I read to my daughters at bedtime.

    Don’t give up, Paul! 1700 words! Wow! Just write on!

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